Some random thoughts on this, that, and the other.
The new TV season is starting off as a true suckfest so far, especially on NBC. The Friends premiere was okay but not great for me. That Coupling show was out-and-out terrible. We didn’t even watch the second half of it it was so bad. Most disappointing though was probably ER. I think that was the worst episode that I’ve ever seen. If this keeps up I might actually get my Thursday nights back. 
Rush Limbaugh is an idiot that doesn’t deserve the words in this sentence that I’m devoting to his latest completely misguided heap of mouth poo.
I’m pretty glad we’re all still here seeing how both of my fantasy football teams actually won a freaking game this weekend. I thought the fabric of the universe might tear apart at the seams due to this cosmic event. This puts the Squeakz at 2-2 in one league and 1-3 in the other. Note to self: if you’re going to name something after your fallen homey in hopes of honoring him, don’t name him after something that sucks. Sorry, Squeaker. You’re still getting the SFFL Championship Trophy named after you.
I seriously cannot wait for the season finale of Paradise Hotel on Fox tomorrow night. At some point I’m going to have to devote some time to explaining why I think this might be the best reality TV show ever, but I’ll give you the short version: because there is absolutely no point to “the game”. I can’t even believe that the people on the show call it “the game”. Each week there are an odd number of people and everyone has to pick a roommate. The odd-person out gets booted. That’s it. It’s like Musical Chairs but if you leave you don’t get to drink all day, eat great food, live like a pampered king, and make out with other hot people to your heart’s content. I hope Keith and Tara “win”, whatever that means.
Bill Simmons is one of my favorite sports columnists ever. He had a great online column back in Boston a few years ago. Now he lives in LA and writes for the Jimmy Kimmel show in addition to having a column on ESPN.com’s Page 2. Not all of you know this but I was a journalism major for about a semester when I first got to Carolina. I really wanted to do exactly the kind of writing that Simmons is doing now. Maybe I’ll give up this whole software thing one day to take a crack at it.
Anyway, one of the highlights for me is when he reads letters from his readers, like this gem from Dave Reynaud in Chapel Hill in the latest mail bag column: “Are Jay Williams and Grant Hill now officially the best backcourt in wheelchair basketball history?” Ouch. So wrong, yet so funny. Good times.
That’s it for now. Bed time.
I’m sorry to disappoint the tens of you that read the blizzog on a regular basis, but I’ve been quite busy lately. I’m currently contracting full-time at Un-named Fortune 500 company in addition to doing smaller projects for a few other clients. I’m just in one of those modes where a lot of the work hits all at the same time and leaves little time for anything else. I know, waaah waah boo-hoo. I thought I’d at least let you know that it was me and not you.
Please glean what enjoyment you can out of the following Random House post until I can get some more coherent thoughts together.
Love,
JG
As if you needed another reason to hate Dookies, you can now add “racial insensitvity” to a list that should by now include things like “the stupid Gothic architecture”, “Coach K”, “Wojo”, “The Shove”, and “the equally stupid floor-slapping thing.” Duke’s Latino community was less than thrilled with the recent Sigma Chi “Viva Mexico” Party, which was advertised with fake expired green cards and pictures of drunk Mexicans. To complete the experience, the door to the party was made out to look like a border partrol checkpoint. Nice.
This is my favorite part. In a letter to the student newspaper, Sigma Chi chapter president Marc Mattioli wrote “[The party] was designed to be a light-hearted celebration of the Mexican tourism scene.”
That’s funny. When AG and I were planning our honeymoon to Cancun, I don’t remember the literature depicting expired green cards and drunk Mexicans. I guess our brochure wasn’t “light-hearted” enough to “celebrate” this particular aspect of the Cancun tourism scene.
If the Dookies want to have a soiree that truly represents some members of the Dook community, they should have a “Viva La Disappointing NBA Career” Party.
Today on ESPN Radio’s “The Dan Patrick Show”, analyst Joe Theisman said that Maurice Clarett’s decision to sue the NFL for the right to be in the 2004 draft was a bad idea because players his age are not mature enough to handle life in the league. I could not agree more. After all, everyone knows what a paragon of maturity, tact, and good life decisions the NFL is.
So if you’re at Un-named Fortune 500 Company and you go to the water cooler to get yourself some more water and there’s a whitish piece of dirty-looking plastic floating at the top of the container, that’s bad right?
Looks like Will Smith isn’t as generous with the help as he is with compliments about himself.
Avast, Blizzog readers! As JT alluded t’ayeterday and me man jigga informed me last week, today be indeed National Talk Like a Pirate Day. Please be aye t’pass this on t’all t’lads and lasss at ye land-lubbin’ offices today.
I encourage ye t’get yerself a good pirate name here. It’also might’nt hurt some of ye scurvy bilge rats t’brush up on ye Pirate speak here. Arrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!
So grab ye yo-ho-ho and have a bottle of rum today, mateys. We be partyin’ like it’s 1659. Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!
- Cap’n Bloody James Read
It’s no secret that I am not above watching some trash TV or some cheezy movies. So you won’t be shocked to learn that I am officially pissed at Fox for dropping one of my favorite new shows from last season, Fastlane. For those of you that never saw it, (MTV’s) Bill Bellamy and Peter Fancinelli (the jerk boyfriend in a cheezy movie favorite, Can’t Hardly Wait) play undercover cops who work for “The Candy Store”, a special unit of the LAPD that uses confiscated property to front the main characters as hardcore street criminals. Tiffany “Don’t Call Me Amber” Thiessen played their boss, Billy.
Though the critics hated it, this was one of my favorite shows from last year. It was like Miami Vice for a new generation. It was produced by McG, the same guy that directed the Charlie’s Angels movies and is also producing one of my new favorites, The O.C.. Each show was cut like a music video and had snappy dialogue that kept things moving. It was something different than your normal boring cop drama - see the played-out Law and Order - and kept thing interesting with fun plotlines and cool guest stars - see Jamie Pressley making out with Theissen towards the end of last season. Nice.
As of this May, it looked like Fastlane had made the cut. Fox dropped the lame-looking John Doe in what appeared to be a show of support for Fastlane. Wrong. Fox now has no mention of the show on its fall line-up and I am bitter. I did some searching around and found out that the show was indeed cancelled. Apparently the price tag for each show - around $2 million - was more than Fox was raking in on advertising. Maybe if they hadn’t screwed it by moving it to Friday nights things would’ve been different.
Fox is apparently trying to mount a challenge against an ostensibly vulnerable NBC on Thursday nights this season. What better move could they have made than to trot out The O.C. at 8 followed by Fastlane at 9? I - I mean my Tivo - would’ve watched.
I would threaten to stop watching you, Fox, but I can’t do that. You have me right where you want me with the Paradise Hotel finale next week and The O.C. coming back after the World Series. Damn you, Fox. Your programming department is a cruel mistress. 
(crickets chirping)
(tumbleweed passes by)
(owls hooting)
………
