"You stay classy… Interwebs."
Apparently the people that made Jim Carey’s latest flick, “Bruce Almighty” used a phone number with a 776 prefix as the number for God (played by Morgan Freeman) instead of the usual non-existent 555 prefix. This has caused headaches for various people around the country who actually have this phone number, as people are calling them all day looking for God. In other news, people are idiots.
The official 1.0 release of the blizzog @ jamiegaines.com will be ready soon. I’ve been working on it for the last week or so when I’ve had some time. It should be pretty sweet.
I think I should have a bad-ass Launch Party. Who’s with me? 
So I got around to checking the log files today on my web server. After seeing posts from the likes of Heather D, Christina, and Ashley (not my wife) on last week’s Blizzog Idol finale post, I thought I should check into how people that I don’t know were finding their way here.
It turns out that the foks at the Ask Jeeves search engine have much love for the Blizzog. To be precise, they have much love for the Blizzog’s love of American Idol. Go to Ask and type in “Clay Aiken” and the Blizzog shows up as the last result on the first page! How’s that for some exposure, baby.
Ask Jeeves has referred 186 unsuspecting Idol fans to the Blizzog in the last two weeks alone. That’s almost 4 times as many referrals as our next highest referring site, the venerable JeffTurner.net with a respectable 64 for the month of May. Third place is a tie with Google and Yahoo bringing in about 20 folks this month, followed by my other blog homies Scotty G and Mark Turner.
I used a pretty bad-ass freeware tool called Analog (at http://www.analog.cx ) to get my stats. It’s written in C and runs wicked fast. It’s open source so you can tool around with it if you want, fellow geeks.
A few other interesting tidbits about the results. It seems that my weakness for cheezy reality TV commentary is what is reeling folks into visit me. The Analog software can show what search engine keywords folks used when they found my site. Tops on the list were: “Clay”, “Clay Aiken”, “Andrew and Jen Firestone”, “The Bachelor”, “Bridge over Troubled Waters”, and “Kirsten”. Not too shabby on The Bachelor front since I only did two posts on it.
And now for the most puzzling referral to the Blizzog in the month of May, but pretty funny I suppose. Kids, you may want to skip this part. There is one referral from a page inside the - are you ready for this? - MassiveCocks.com web site. The page itself is password protected, so I couldn’t see exactly what it was. The site is not about larger-than-average farm fowl, in case you were wondering, so don’t go trying to look at it at work. For that matter, don’t go looking at it at home unless you have your pop-up killer turned on.
I’ll leave it to you the loyal Blizzog reader to determine why on earth someone would link to us from MassiveCocks.com. Be nice.
Since it seems that anything goes with Nike these days, I’m wondering if I can get them to sign me to a contract sponsoring my development work. I can see it now: “Air Geek” shoes. They could have commercials of me typing in rhythm with a phat hip-hop beat like they do with those basketball guys.
I need an agent. Somebody get me David Falk on the line.
Though the Blizzog feels that Clay Aiken should be the American Idol, we can’t at all hate on Ruben Studdard. Congratulations to both finalists. You have great careers ahead of you.
This just in: Clay has taken the states of Ohio and North Carolina in the race for the American Idol title.
Hmmm. Two states that love the Big Tall Whitey. Two states where I have lived.
Coincidence? I think not.
For the last 20 minutes straight I have been trying to vote for Clay by dialing 1-866-IDOLS-02. Busy signal every time.
If all these stupid teenage girls would just get off the damn phone then the rest of us pathetic “adults” could get a chance.
I give up. I’m going to bed. You’re on your own, Big Whitey. Don’t say I didn’t try to help you out.
It’s late and I’m too tired to adequately defend this point right now, but Warren Buffet has written a smart, insightful editorial in the Washington Post about the folly of the Bush Administration’s dividend tax cut as a means to stimulate the economy. I’ll come back to this later when I have the energy, but I think this article is definitely worth reading.
So I got glasses today. I’m not happy about this. I’ve been getting aweful headaches after spending long days in front of the computer. My eyes have just been revolting on me.
It’s not a very strong prescription. I actually have 20/20 vision, but the eyes just can’t go the distance any more. I apparently have an astigmatism in my right eye that makes it hard for me to perceive the difference between small objects. You know, like dwarves and midgets? We discovered this after the nice lady at the optometrist assured me that “dot” and “squiggle” were not valid answers on the eye chart.
I’m getting used to them pretty quickly, but I don’t think Ashley likes them. I think they make me look smarter, and I think we all know I could use help in that department. I’ll try to post a dope picture soon.
Wow. What a great night… for Clay. Here’s the recap.
Ruben’s first performance was just okay, but not great.
Clay’s first performance was quite simply incredible. I think that song was perfectly crafted for his voice. It was easily his performance of the series. By the way, big ups to the picture of lil’ Clay in front of the South of The Border sign. Werd.
Paula’s remarks tonight were just plain wacky as usual. My favorite was the “You found the Matrix of that song” comment. What? Are you on the Warner Brothers payroll? She’s gone from being overly nice to being overly nice and impossible to understand.
Moving on, Ruben’s rendition of “Imagine” was his best of the night. He did a great job. Clay’s “Here, There, Everywhere” didn’t really do much for me. Randy called it correctly when he said Clay was playing it safe.
Again, I just didn’t think Ruben brought the house down with his final song. “Flying Without Wings” is apparently a song by some UK boy band called Westlife. That song sucked. It’s a shame that they used Ruben to pimp some other crappy band. Looking beyond the song, the performance was just not strong to me. I really think Ruben’s voice is breaking down under the strain of the competion. Maybe he needs to go pray at Paula’s “Church of Ruben.” Huh?
I was scared when I saw the choir stay out with Clay for his “Bridge Over Troubled Waters” performance. I thought they overpowered him a bit at times and he would’ve been better off singing it solo. He just destroyed it at the end though. That was pretty awesome. I think his first performance was his best, but this last song was up there. In my opinion it has sealed the deal for him. But then again, America is pretty stupid.
Note to Ryan Secreast: Prince called. He wants his Purple Rain outfit back. Freak.
Blizzog Prediction
Clay should win it but I think Ruben will get the title. I hope I’m wrong.
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