Olympic Commentators

My nights and weekends have basically been on lockdown since the Olympics started.  AG and I have been soaking up almost every second of the primetime coverage that NBC has put out there.  Besides having “AT&T Wireless is The Dank” drilled into my head by Michael Phelps and now knowing more than I ever wanted to about NBC’s fall lineup, I have also had the chance to form some opinions about the announcers covering the various events.

Gymnastics

Wow.  Where do I start with the power announcing troika of Al Trautwig, Tim Daggett and Elfi Schlegel?  I really couldn’t stand them during the last Olympics.  They were the poster children for bad Olympics commentary: Clueless network play-by-play guy coupled with over-opinionated, has-been former athlete as “color” commentator.  Al never knew what was going on and Tim and Elfi slammed everyone.  I went into this Olympics expecting the same thing.

As I was reflecting over the last week and gathering my thoughts for this post, I realized that while I still find them all somewhat annoying, they actually did a really good job of calling this competition. Al kinda represents the rest of us out there watching the competition who have no idea what is going on and ask stupid questions everytime somebody seems to screw up or finish an apparatus.  “Was that bad?!”,  “Is it over for him?!”  Al was pretty much like this last time, so that part hasn’t changed.  I think what’s different this time around is that Tim and Elfi have toned it down a lot. They did a really good job of pointing out little mistakes in the routines here and there that were going to cause deductions, but not in a zealous way like in 2000.  Despite Daggett stupidly declaring Paul Hamm out of the medal picture in the Men’s All-Around after he fell on his vault, he really did a good job of being pretty fair this year I thought.

So Al’s stupidity has actually turned into a boon for the rest of us who are just as clueless when it comes to how this things is scored.  I was going to register one other complaint about Al’s tendency to try to make the moment bigger than it is by making this grand proclamation that always seems to fall flat, but then I realized the fact that he’s so bad at it makes for some good unintentional comedy so I’ll let it be.  I liked how Al explained one team had started off the night great, but then fallen into a “funnel of despair”.  What?!!  Or when they came back from commercial towards the end of the Women’s All-Around and Al had this gem that went something like, “Here in ancient times the Greeks worshipped all kinds of gods.  Well, the God of Drama is watching over this Women’s All-Around tonight.”  Good times.

Swimming

I don’t have a ton to say on this, but I’d be remiss not to send a shout-out to my man (and probable kin) Rowdy Gaines.  First of all, props to Rowdy for keeping his traditional adjective first name that all Gaines’ are given at birth.  (I was “Naughty”, by the way.  Jamie is actually the Shawnee Indian word for “naughty one“.  It’s true.)  You can’t say that Rowdy doesn’t know his stuff.  He correctly predicted the lead our guys would need to have in the 4 x 100 relay to beat the Thorpedo (possibly one of the stupidest nicknames ever, btw).  My only complaint about Rowdy is that when the race gets close or something exciting happens, all of the sudden it’s like you’re at a Backstreet Boys concert with a 13 year-old girl.  His voice gets all high-pitched and he strings his words together like he can’t help himself.  “OHMYGAWDITHINKHE’SGOING TOOVERTAKEHIMANDREACHFORTHEWIN……YES!!!!!!”  Settle down, Rowdy……but you’re still the man.

Track and Field

I have little to say about this except for the pudgy dude they’ve been trotting out there with the grey curly porn-star haircut.  I have no idea what his name is, but they have got to tone down my man’s makeup.  I feel like Harvey Firestein in Hairspray is breaking down the Men’s 100m for me.  Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Women’s Beach Volleyball

I’d probably have something to say about this if I wasn’t so fixated on Misty May’s booty the whole time.  Do they even have commentators for this one?